Great Expectations

Today, as I was stalking one of my Facebook friend (why else do I have them if I won't stalk them... hehe!), I came across a status that really got me thinking. It said, "In life never have expectations; you won't be disappointed." My gut reaction was to write a long comment in response to what I thought was not a very well-thought status update. But I reserved my thoughts for this lovely blog!! Of course what I will share is my opinion, but I believe it to be well-founded and, at the least, worth thinking about.

First, I think that expectations play an integral part in shaping our lives -- our personal intellectual growth and outward success. Personally, if I had no expectations for myself from a tender age, I would not be writing on this blog. If my father had no expectations for himself, he would not have worked hard at school and earned the education he has today. And, obviously, my life story would be different; I may be, today, some obscure unicellular amoeba with the least complex thoughts. I may be stretching it, but my point is, self-imposed expectations serve us well many of the times. They help us set our own standards; they help us stretch ourselves and reach our limits, and even exceed them. Without them, I really feel many of us would be aimless.

Second, I feel that the expectations we have of other people are crucial in shaping our relationships with others. If I did not expect to be loved and cared for by my friends, I wouldn't know who my friends are. If I did not have expectations for how to be treated by, for example, my wife (just an example, not to panic!) I would never know (and maybe, would never care) if she was still committed or not. Having expectations for others in the context of our relationships with them, to me, helps us to identify those relationships that result in mutual growth and development.

Finally, I would like to suggest that being disappointed is not always a bad thing. Many times, we feel comfortable in feelings that deaden or keep anxiety at bay. Disappointment heightens anxiety and, in some way, uncertainty. I believe that being able to manage anxiety very well, and indeed disappointment, is one sure way to grow emotionally. Emotional maturity is essential to each leader because as we go in the business of leadership, there are several moments of disappointment and anxiety we will have to deal with personally and as teams. Unless we are ready to face disappointment and anxiety head-on, we may never take risks and never grow from, possibly, mediocre performance levels.

Essentially, if I were to edit my friend's status, it would read, "In life value your expectations; you won't be disappointed -- in the long-run." Great expectations for yourself may cause you to grow in so many ways. Great expectations for others may attract healthy, beneficial relationships for yourself. And great expectations may result in tremendous success -- punctuated with brief, worthwhile disappointment.